This is the most honest, raw, humorous and at the same time, painful thing I’ve read that you’ve written. And I love it. What a snapshot into the moment of what you’re living. Very well written. I felt like I was in it too, and I felt the walls crushing in around me as I read. I felt my breath go shallow and my heart constrict. Thank you for sharing this. I love to read about the funny, stupid, frustrating, heartbreaking, and just plain nitty gritty stuff going on in your life. I’m so sorry that it sucks so bad.
Writing this honestly is such an incredible gift.
You’re a wonderful writer. So if that was on your bucket list, you can check that off.
People are generally either way too charitable about themselves, thinking they are much better and virtuous than they are, or they are too hard on themselves, thinking they have pretty much failed. Then another person hears or sees this, and thinks "Man, I don't see you that way at all."
The older I get, the more clearly I can remember foolish things I've believed, or done, or said. And I wish I never did that, and wish I could change it. But I can't undo the thing, can't unsay the words, can't erase the harm.
I had a list of things I thought I would accomplish by 40. Some of them I did, in others I failed bigly. So I think, "I am a failure." (deep sigh)
Then somebody from my past will show up, or comment. "Remember when you talked to me about this thing I was doing/going through? Well, that talk changed my life, for the better." Or my wife will remind me of something I did well. Or I will look at my life through a different lens.
Early on I decided that I had no desire to be an expert, or specialist, at anything. I decided to be a "generalist." Rather than do any one thing expertly, I wanted to be a little bit adept at many, many things. Reminiscing now I can see that, in this pursuit, sometimes I took large risks.
Ron, it seems to me that you have done things that require great courage. You say that many of your friends never married, never had children. But you did. You risked heartbreak, and more. You didn't just "have a kid." You jumped in with both feet, and committed to having and raising five children. Who else does that? Precious few people. It's easy to criticize parents, because they WILL make mistakes. But parents give LIFE, and parents will bleed themselves out to care for a child, whether the child is grateful or not. Parenthood means pain. Who chooses that?
You've earned your living as a solo-entrepreneur. Probably 90% of people lack the courage. Entrepreneurship means struggle. Few have the courage for it.
Choosing just one thing from your list, I thought I wanted to be a falconer too. Then I studied up, and learned that falconry requires 100% dedication, and daily work. Expert falconers ONLY do falconry. I wanted to be a Dad instead. Bye bye falconry. The other things on my list look equally unappealing in retrospect.
Anyone who doesn't know pain, struggle or failure has probably not attempted much. In my opinion Ron, you have dared greatly, stumbled, got back up, dared again. In this way, your life is an inspiration to me, and has value and merit in itself.
All great thoughts. Thank you. (By the way, I haven't given up on Falconry yet. I took the first step: had one session and bought the Apprentice Study book... someday when the kids are gone, perhaps.)
I didn't shave my head. :) But I did walk away from a well paying job and career with zero idea of what I was going to do next. Who knew it would be working with horses!!
This is the most honest, raw, humorous and at the same time, painful thing I’ve read that you’ve written. And I love it. What a snapshot into the moment of what you’re living. Very well written. I felt like I was in it too, and I felt the walls crushing in around me as I read. I felt my breath go shallow and my heart constrict. Thank you for sharing this. I love to read about the funny, stupid, frustrating, heartbreaking, and just plain nitty gritty stuff going on in your life. I’m so sorry that it sucks so bad.
Writing this honestly is such an incredible gift.
You’re a wonderful writer. So if that was on your bucket list, you can check that off.
People are generally either way too charitable about themselves, thinking they are much better and virtuous than they are, or they are too hard on themselves, thinking they have pretty much failed. Then another person hears or sees this, and thinks "Man, I don't see you that way at all."
The older I get, the more clearly I can remember foolish things I've believed, or done, or said. And I wish I never did that, and wish I could change it. But I can't undo the thing, can't unsay the words, can't erase the harm.
I had a list of things I thought I would accomplish by 40. Some of them I did, in others I failed bigly. So I think, "I am a failure." (deep sigh)
Then somebody from my past will show up, or comment. "Remember when you talked to me about this thing I was doing/going through? Well, that talk changed my life, for the better." Or my wife will remind me of something I did well. Or I will look at my life through a different lens.
Early on I decided that I had no desire to be an expert, or specialist, at anything. I decided to be a "generalist." Rather than do any one thing expertly, I wanted to be a little bit adept at many, many things. Reminiscing now I can see that, in this pursuit, sometimes I took large risks.
Ron, it seems to me that you have done things that require great courage. You say that many of your friends never married, never had children. But you did. You risked heartbreak, and more. You didn't just "have a kid." You jumped in with both feet, and committed to having and raising five children. Who else does that? Precious few people. It's easy to criticize parents, because they WILL make mistakes. But parents give LIFE, and parents will bleed themselves out to care for a child, whether the child is grateful or not. Parenthood means pain. Who chooses that?
You've earned your living as a solo-entrepreneur. Probably 90% of people lack the courage. Entrepreneurship means struggle. Few have the courage for it.
Choosing just one thing from your list, I thought I wanted to be a falconer too. Then I studied up, and learned that falconry requires 100% dedication, and daily work. Expert falconers ONLY do falconry. I wanted to be a Dad instead. Bye bye falconry. The other things on my list look equally unappealing in retrospect.
Anyone who doesn't know pain, struggle or failure has probably not attempted much. In my opinion Ron, you have dared greatly, stumbled, got back up, dared again. In this way, your life is an inspiration to me, and has value and merit in itself.
All great thoughts. Thank you. (By the way, I haven't given up on Falconry yet. I took the first step: had one session and bought the Apprentice Study book... someday when the kids are gone, perhaps.)
Why can I relate to all of that? Oh because I’m 57 and been there!
I say it’s not too late. Write that book! Even if you put together all of these stories and bind it.
😬
You've been through it? And you didn't shave your head? 😆
Great idea on the book: I might just do that.
I didn't shave my head. :) But I did walk away from a well paying job and career with zero idea of what I was going to do next. Who knew it would be working with horses!!
That’s awesome. I’ve heard a few stories like that. Horses seem to be good therapy for a lot of people with a lot of different backgrounds.